lily, marry me.. =)

yeah.. you broke my heart pretty, but it’s okay.. there is always a next time..

yeah right..

i came across this article in newspaper and also watched it on tv, which i would like to share it with everyone..

click here.. hehe..

kalo mcm tu, jom kawen!

owh lupe plak org tak sudi.. kah3!

and so i remember what i learned during history classes when i was form 4 or form 5.. tak sure sgtlah..

so Che Det, akan tercapaikah impian anda untuk memenuhi dasar kependudukan Malaysia?

tapi still, byk je anak luar nikah yang dilahirkan.. tu tak membantu ke untuk mencapai matlamat 70 juta orang penduduk malaysia??

put your very own title..

salam alyk…

my greatest fear for the holiday came true..

“boringness”

as in, i dont really know what to do..
i do have some plan in my mind for the holiday, but still, everything can only be done after my btn which is from 1st june till 5th june..

so currently, i’m quite lazy to go online since there are only few kmbians available, and those people pon i hardly spoke to them in college.. so i dunno.. i dun have the mood.. even old friends pon i dont have the mood to do so.. sorry..

well, since i’m all alone, i’ve been reminiscing a lot about KMB..

singgah blog budak2 kmb, mostly wrote bout kmb..

“ko pon nnt wa mesti tulis pasal kmb gak kan..”

said a friend before she went to btn.. i bet she’s missing me right now.. kah3.. *lesbo tak? tak kan…*

i dont know what to write about kmb.. sebenarnye byk, tp kan dah kate td, takde mood la nak wat ape2.. it’s just that, i love all the people in KMB.. seriously.. mmg la tempat die tak berape bes tapi orang2 kat ctu yang bes..

so now i am missing everyone..

owh one more thing, i’m damn nervous about tonight.. man u vs barcelona..

sumpah weyh.. this is very big man!

plus, i’ll be watching the match with 2 chelsea fans ( along and aji) and also one not-so-sure-which-side-he-chose (abah) because he said that both team are so strong that he cannot do any prediction..

sorry people at btn, i hope u guys can actually find someway to watch it.. or maybe u guys are too tired to stay awake to do so..

“please pretty please, dont break my heart“

pathetically pathetic..

though i think i easily express my feelings through my face expressions, still, i think i need more than that…

i find it very hard to really express my feelings to somebody..

i mean by words..

words..

words..

yeah words..

ugh.. i feel so pathetic.. pathetically pathetic..

when I’m angry, i don’t want to just tell the people that I’m angry, as it will be clearly displayed on my face, but i want to say  “I’m mad at you” and  tell the reasons why..

when I’m happy, i don’t want to just tell the people that I’m happy, but i also want to spread the happiness.. this one, i don’t think people do need specific reasons to do so..

when i hate dislike or feel uncomfortable with something or someone, erm, this one i do not really show it, but u can sometimes detect my hesitancy, still, i really think that they have to know the reasons..

when i like or feel comfortable with something or someone, this one I’m not sure whether people can tell or not, still i really want to tell them so..  but, i don’t know how to do so and I’m sure it will damn awkward if i do so..

why? people said that i look

“garang”, “mcm mafia”, “muke samseng”, “ganas” , yadayadayadayadayada….

ok. maybe to some extent it’s true that i’m a bit kasar, but well dat will be another topic to speak about later.

so that is why, it would be something weird if suddenly i say those positive things to people.. it will be consider as “geli” by me or even those who hears it..because it’s from me.. and my message cannot be successfully delivered.. as in sometimes, people might think it as main2.. ades

and also, i really needs to clarify the reasons for me being mad of someone.. as in i hope that the person will not repeat the same mistakes again and again.. maybe some people think it would be okay later on as we will eventually be immuned with them, but what if i’m not? what if i keep it in my heart and later as it reach the maximum capacity and explode?

alright.. i know i’m not the only one who think like this, there maybe some other people out there who feels the same way as i do..

the thing is people, my point is that, i might seems lepak, tak kesah sgt, buat bodo je, malas nak layan, but deep in my heart, aku byk bende yang aku simpan..

sometimes i feel like crying, well i did, as i cannot really tell people what am i feeling.. worst come to worst, it would be really frustrating when people misinterpret my actions (attitude, face expressions, behaviour, what i speak, my tone and register and so on…) or in other word.. misinterpret me as a whole..

tapi pape pon.. Allah itu maha mengetahui.. from Him is the only one i ask for my strength..

13. Dan tuturkanlah perkataan kamu Dengan perlahan atau Dengan nyaring, (sama sahaja keadaannya kepada Allah), kerana Sesungguhnya Allah Maha mengetahui akan Segala (isi hati) Yang terkandung di Dalam dada.

14. Tidakkah Allah Yang menciptakan sekalian makhluk itu mengetahui (segala-galanya)? sedang ia Maha Halus urusan PentadbiranNya, lagi Maha mendalam PengetahuanNya!

(al-mulk, 67: 13-14)

so dear X,  i really hope that u dont feel too proud with ur victory, as u have lost to me for umpteen time.. and yet, i dont feel proud about it and i think i’ve been patient enough with you.. i’ve wrote a post expressing my dissatisfaction towards you once.. and this is twice..  i wish i could beg to you to stop being so egoistic just like i am as it will only brings disaster.. being ignorant and egoistic at the same time is what orang melayu called as “bodoh sombong”.. i did that so many times too.. and so i dont want you to be like dat..i’m sori..

dear XY, just please stop being so “oversensitive”.. i’m not the kind of person who cannot control my feelings.. i know my limit.. just give my my chance to indulge it.. i guess u are the one who is weird and not acting like usual.. still, i’m enjoying  whatever i’m feeling towards u, XY..

dear people other than X and XY, dun worry, i have no problemo with you guys..

to X,XY, and other people, silalah berusaha bersungguh2.. usaha gile2 la thap dewa naga la senang cakap.. ni last kot.. pasni mane ade nak wat IB lagi.. sekali seumur hidup kot!!!

cheerio people~

-aku yang ego-

Selimutkan rinduku, bersama malammu… =)

“mak dah nak balik ke? tggu la kejap.. =(”

“yela.. takpe.. mak blh tggu lg setengah jam.. bas tu smpai lg setengah jam..”

setengah jam berlalu..

“okaylah mak balik dulu ye..”

“okay. sayang mak. =)” sambil salam dan cium pipi mak.

“mak sayang adik” lalu memeluk dan mencium pipiku kemudian tersenyum indah..

……………………………………………….

7.15, 16 april 2009

“hello assalamualaikum. mak~ tgh buat ape tuh?”

“tgh tggu sume org pegi keje..”

dan perbualan pon berlanjutan sehinggalah..

“owh ye, malam tadi mak ade buat bacaan yasin sikit kat kelas marhaban untuk cek sempena nak exam ni. anak kawan2 mak pon sume ade jugak yang nak exam. so buat skali la.”

“owh ye? terima kasih”………

tak semena-mena air mataku mengalir..Subhanallah.. begitulah hebatnya kasih seorang ibu.. Allah sampaikan doa dan kasih ibu dalam mimpi aku pada malam tersebut. selalunya, aku akan bermimpi tentang seseorang, kalau sebelum tidur atau sepanjang hari tu ade lah perkara yang mengaitkan aku dengan org tu.. but again, for the whole day, takde pon perkara yang berkaitan dengan mak yang berlaku..

“Dan Kami wajibkan manusia berbuat baik kepada kedua ibu bapanya; ibunya telah mengandungnya Dengan menanggung kelemahan Demi kelemahan (dari awal mengandung hingga akhir menyusunya), dan tempoh menceraikan susunya ialah Dalam masa dua tahun; (dengan Yang demikian) bersyukurlah kepadaKu dan kepada kedua ibubapamu; dan (ingatlah), kepada Akulah jua tempat kembali (untuk menerima balasan).”

-Luqman (31):14-

ye mak, cek sayang mak.. cek akan cuba yang terbaik dan semampu yang boleh. tak perlu risau~

owh ye abah juga, cek akan sentiasa happy kalau itu boleh buatkan abah happy. sbb abah kate,” kalau cek happy, abah pon happy. tak kesahla ape pon. =)”

owh IB exam, i’ll be seeing you soon..  may we both shall have a good time together~ =)

takde keje la sgt kan~

di sebalik kelahiran KASANOVA yang semakin rancak tatkala senja berlabuh,

muncul pula seorang serikandi LESBIAN yang hanya mampu tersenyum dalam pemerhatian..

p/s: at least aku tak gila talak. kahx100. post sekadar mahu mengekspresi apa yang dirasakan oleh hati penuh dengan pertanyaan. semua kenyataan di atas tidak ada kene mengena dengan yang hidup atau yang mati.

i guess it’s not really hard to read the sign..

“wawa nk tgk tak sumtink yg sangat cantik selain aku”

“aku ke? dah slalu tgk”

” bkn ;P. niha..”

and so i arrived to the site. i’ve read it before.

well.. i’ve been thinking of wat she was trying to do..

terharu gak.. indirectly she was  trying to tell me dat she care.

she dun want me to get involve in those stupid things.

well, i might be crazy, and i talked crap, of how i was planning to.. paham3 la..

still, i’m not a dare devil on that part. cinta dalam hati jelah.

like i told her, i did not look at “the picture” tau for the whole holiday. *clap2*

(but still we did “talk”. ler.. sume org pon aku “talk”..  i’ve learned my lesson okayh from Encik yang-perasan-die-hensem-best-dan-ramai-peminat)

yela. ckp je lebat, letop je lebey. tapi kalo dlm hal nih sume tu takpe. aku tak buat bende2 pelik. aku nih pemalula. yela. aku nih kecut. so?

thanks ye.

life is getting better. despite all the ujian, i discover that there are lots of people who care, well, LOVE me. and i also discover my love towards people around me. yes, i love everyone. therefore.

if i die tomorrow or whenever, i just want all the people in my life to know that i love you, regardless of whatever kind of treatment that u have received or will from me, or i had received or will from you. forgive me as i forgive you.

I LOVE YOU

yours sincerely,

w@w@

(or as some might call me by this name)

farihah

p/s: ye.. aku jiwang.. so? haha. u just need to know me better okayh? =)

satu lagi, aku tak suke kmb tapi aku suke org2 kat kmb. lagi bape lame je nak jumpe org2 tuh. so KMB, wait for me..  ;P

man of honour

He is…

caring, but yet he’s too paranoid. the older we gets, the more he treats us like a brainless, carefree teenagers. but we know he cares actually.

funny, but yet he could be so panas baran. when he’s mad (bengang), no one speaks. but when he makes jokes, we can laugh till we cry or till our stomach muscle cramp.

tough, yet he’s very gentle. bekas askar, tough la kan? yet everytime mak pukul kitorg dengan rotan akibat kedegilan yang melampau, he came with minyak angin and sapukan kat tempat kene pukul tu while consoling us.

very talkative, as in friendly, but could also be merimaskan and mulutnyer agak laser especially bile marah. he makes people feel comfortable by not staying quite, but to some extent he asked a lots of question. owh lupe, bekas anggota perisikan askar. padanla.

man of his words, except on quitting smoking. it make sense when he scolded us for not putting things back at their place because thats what he always do. but again, every newyear or his birthday, ckp nak quit smoking. paling lama tahan 3 hari je kot. then naaaaahhh.. Alhamdulillah he’s still healthy except for high blood pressure since he eat healthy diet such as lots of plain water, ulam and sayur.

on top of all, he loves his wife and children so much and he can, will and of course had done so many things for us.

i wish my future husband will have all the good qualities that this man possessed but please cross out the bad ones. tambah satu lagi, good looking, as my abah is a good looking man. or used to be before perut die boroi.haha!

so many good wishes to list, so as to make it easier, i want to wish All the good wishes for him~

o Allah, please take care of him.

and also please grant all my wishes for him.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ABAH!

cek Sayang Abah!

sgt2.

16th March 2009

57 thn

(tapi abah kate die baru 37.. layan~)

p/s: owh. yeah u can me daddy’s girl. i’m the most spoiled by him and therefore my brothers used to use me to pujuk him if they want something or go somewhere, or do something. kecut owh ngan abah. but not anymore. everybody has grown up now. except for me. yet! =)

porcelain the second?

“wa, jangan biarkan ade porcelain yang kedua”

owh tidak.. porcelain hanya satu..

tp kemungkinan untuk lahir seorang lagi yang sama waktu dengan porcelain tp bukan porcelain itu ttp ade..

maaf..

besnyer rasa sakit…

salam alyk..

learned in biology that the pain sensation is very important. Why? so that we can know what is wrong with our body and can response as in take action to survive. true2. so true. can you imagine not having the pain sensation? so then if you were stabbed by a knife at your stomach, you will feel nothing but end up, die! tak pasal-pasal la plak.. dah tak sempat nak selamatkan diri untuk mecari peluang bertaubat..Na’uzubillah. Allah ni mmg bijak. segala yang diciptakan-Nya bukanlah untuk main2 tapi ade tujuannya..

so if we are going to relate this with life, but how? well the pain should be reprensenting the obstacles in life. why? you see, everytime we face any kinds of trouble, we tend to be alert, and try our best to look for the solutions. wait, so what if we dont have any problems in our life? lagi bes kot! erm… but then again, how can you be sure that everything in your life is good enough? what if we dont really aware of the problems and all of sudden things went all wrong. nah. kan dah payah tuh? so let us think that everytime we are facing any kinds of problems, it is actually one of the way that Allah is trying to tell us that something is wrong with us. as in, there are alots of things that need to be improved. plus, in my opinion, life without problems is not life. but still, how could it be that there is people who seems not to be bother by the problems? well, here comes the magik word. SABAR aka PATIENCE. easier said than done right? to be patience is very hard. and that’s why Allah will give a huge reward for those who are SABAR. sabar je la ye wa.. kalo jodoh tak mana.. *tetibe*

salam alyk~

=)

rindunyerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr………

Salam maulidur Rasul

Selawat ke atas baginda..